Friday, January 29, 2010

i saw my crush wtf after the post.

so it's not a bad weekend after all

but maybe it is because after the post yesterday
i got inspired
word-vomitted
and now i think my writing is bleh

maybe it would serve a good blogpost

but anyways that will be decided by the Flipside (ADP Magazine) Head
so whatever
yaye.

beautiful day isn't it

29th of January
i name it ADP Day (i know, wtf, but let me have my moments kay)

it was really nostalgic
i miss so much
it was really funny
someone got conned into buying gap
it was really happy
someone got to finish glee online
it was really fantastic
someone got accepted into a university of main choice
it was really ...
someone ... got into the car after i reached ground floor

it was really constructive
i'm really into this p.a.s.s. thing
i'm really into this sociology thing

i'm living.

i is the happy.

(: (i have blue eyes wtf haha)
Sorry peeps, am a lousy blogger I will admit.
And inconsistent.
Been busy. And it's a good thing!
Finally I have an occupation! Heh.

Just some updates which I wanna share:

Am chosen to lead P.A.S.S. (Peer Assisted Study Sessions, screw the label it's jus tutoring) for MATH 161 (Calculus for Business and Social Sciences) which by the way, is not a course I have taken in the past. Have been wanting to be a tutor since I was a fucking kid. I know, FML/WTF.

Am very occupied trying to digest and apply Sociological theories (which by the way fascinate me alongside the philosophies it comes into contact with).

Am very convinced to either double major in the future in Chemistry and probably Sociology. Beautiful (dream).

Am thinking I was stupid to have submitted my name for Flipside content writing. Fiction, oh my God. Deadline, 3 weeks. I think the blender will need to work longer for me to get that amount of creative juice. Oy (Justine, 2010).

Am hungry and craving for Japanese food with a friend bragging to me via text that she's having Japanese. It's 1715 hours btw. Fml.

Am gonna have a bad weekend 'cause didn't see my crush. WTF. (Touch wood.)

Am freaking out over my inability to produce a single word for my Sociology journal. Which btw is on the issue of euthanasia. Which btw has a deadline after the day Kris Allen comes to Malaysia. I know. FML to the power of tangent of 90 degrees.

Am tired. Am alone. FML.

The library is boring when you wanna take a break from your intensely excruciating research work. MLIA.

Oh, and

We're having green week in ADP next week and am gonna wear lotsa green! Yaye!

and

Am freaking out because I really wanna start and finish my first draft for my Sociology research paper ASAP. And can't even settle with the main idea. FML. The restriction of the research being highly objective is killing me. Lucky we have journals, but the topic I want is not fucking there. Yaye D:

Enough negativity. MLIA. And I'm happy nevertheless.

Miss (seeing) ya. /:

Friday, January 22, 2010

so i am discouraged,

and I'm sick of being sad because of something alien to my biological form.

Go away, humans.
Ugh.

OMG I LOVE YOU. D:

Saturday, January 16, 2010

same direction.

I wish I could read 10000000 minds at a time. That would make sociological imagination much easier and accurate. (When will I stop being stupid?)

I need answers. Oh forget answers; everybody wants answers but we never get any - in the end we just assume. But how far, really, can these porcelain constructions last? How much more strain can they handle? Will the time come soon in the event where all the premises are to be destroyed and a wholly new architecture erected?

And here I am, trying (so hard) to study the existing system of thoughts and my mediocre brain capacity and concentration span not helping, at all (instead it goes the other way). Man.

Anyways, I was thinking about my Sociology research paper. Gonna go solo this time, hassle-free. Indulgence in Sociology is finally achievable: best possible lecturer, best possible lectures, and despite the gruesome air conditioning, the best discussion classes. I have not spoken in class, mainly due to the fear of my emotional offensiveness, but I will make sure that comes to an end.

The auditorium is cold. My favorite spot is under the vent. Fuck that.

Back to the paper. My list of possible topics (with the required emphasis on "Effects") has been generated, but my main interest lies on the topic of sexuality. This paper offers me another way of studying the topic; instead of clinging onto the same archaic psychological (or worse, stereotypical) explanations, I seek new ideas.

Other topics include:

Same-Sex Marriage & Adoption. (I hope it is appropriate social research.) Why do homosexual couples want to get married? I assume it is either marriage means a lot (which I doubt, because cohabitation is already sufficient and equivalent) or, adoption of kids is desired to take place. Segregation of marriage and parenthood. Issues. "If you don't like gay marriage then don't marry a gay person." Wtf haha.

Suicide. This will benefit me more, I think. And Dr Adnan is a suicidologist. Fuck yeah! Love him, he is the best lecturer anyone can get for Sociology (or maybe Psychology, I wish he taught that).

Gender conditioning. Another reexamination of topic. Studying this seem interesting as it was intriguing work when I first came into contact with it.

Racism. Nuff said.

Is promiscuity an issue? Ha-ha.

Last resort: Consumerism.

Any ideas, people? I need help here. Am still an infantile-minded person.

In the last Sociology class, the topic of homosexuality makes its return. I was shocked (and disappointed) to hear that my idea of sexuality being a continuum is rational and possible (disappointed because I didn't say it, there goes class participation).

Here's my view. It is a tad different from what the proponent said in class, nevertheless identical. IMO, everyone is falls in between the continuum between the two extremes of utter 'manliness' - complete masculinity, and total feminity, regardless of sex. Of course, though, sex plays a part in determining your alleged amount of hormone and hence affecting the position in the continuum but sex does not say exactly where you are. Genetics play, and of course the wonders of gender conditioning (or accidental gender conditioning), trauma and mainly the psychological development instills a certain sense of direction in the dot.

The difference of my continuum and theirs is the two extremes - they placed homosexuality and heterosexuality of both sides. What about zoophilia and pedophilia and the sorts? I am starting to think there is more to the continuum, which might be the possible event that there are more than two extremes.

What do you think?
Trying to make my brain work seemed a bit lame. I am still infantile at this.

Ever had a zit on your chest? A fucking bitch it is.

Please voice your opinions, silent lurkers (if there are any). I value it with my life. It's time I learn to think. I hope Marx's theory of Thesis, Antithesis and Synthesis works.

Thesis: Me.
Antithesis: Hatred & Murder.
Synthesis: Space. Food. Oxygen.

I kid (but no one laughs). So please tell me what you think, about anything.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Saturday, January 9, 2010

NAWH..

I wish things get hell of a good turn when classes start.
Fuck this state of mine.